Debt collection as an art, not a science

Oh, the trials and tribulations of clearing debts. Today, perhaps, I have cleared the final debt owed to a health care provider for Alanna. Lovelace hospital has been sending me statements for about a year for a 25 month old ER visit Alanna had in September 2007. Each statement has read "Total Amount Due From You $0.00" So a month ago I began receiving collections notices on a $125 debt owed to Lovelace for this visit. "No way," I said! The statements have never showed an amount owed bigger than ZERO. They wouldn't send me to collections before giving me a chance to pay them directly. WRONG! Today I called the collection agency for the second time responding to a very tersely worded second notice on the supposed debt. They were polite but insistent that the hospital showed monies owed.

I called the hospital this afternoon. They said that they had finally settled up with the insurance company in August and that apparently we had never paid our co-pay. Hmmm. It's possible, but highly unlikely, I thought. Rats. A check of the bank statements confirms that no copay was charged for the hospital stay. Because the account is so old (mighty old in my book), the system sends it straight to collections, rather than issuing a statement for me to pay. Although I think that sucks for a reason to send it to collections, at least I get it. I offered to pay the hospital directly because I have such an aversion for collections agencies. The person explained that everything will be resolved faster if I pay the agency rather than the hospital, but that the hospital would take the payment if I wanted to roll the dice. No thanks.

A quick call back to the agency puts me in touch with a guy who seemed to want me to fight this because Alanna is deceased. I actually had to insist to the collection agent that I wanted to pay this thing off immediately. Sheesh!! And now it's done.

Will this end the streak? Can we finally, more than 18 months after her death, put the memories of those hospital visits to rest? I ain't holding my breath. If it takes them two years to figure out billing for an ER visit, then the statute of limitations on the last hospital stay must be at least that long.

And the government can really screw this up worse than the private sector?? I'm here to say that I don't believe that for a minute.